MemeMachineGo!

=v= My reality collided with toon reality again. I'm more of a comic strip guy than a comic book guy, to the point of actually having my reality (and myself) show up in comic strips. Why, just last Thursday, an email exchange I'd had with a local cartoonist blossomed into a comic strip in the local paper.

I got more than I bargained for that day, though.

I was walking up Broadway — the Broadway in San Francisco, that is — to see my editor for lunch, when I was stopped at a corner to let some emergency vehicles pass by. I noticed the vehicles on the side of the road, just sitting there, idling, while a picturesque firefighter or two stood on them, striking heroic poses. I was a bit confused until I noticed the movie cameras. Somebody presumably said, "Action!" because all of a sudden the vehicles all came to life and zoomed up a picturesque San Francisco hill.

A block further down, I noticed that the city had been occupied by a bunch of excessively handsome men in Army fatigues.

After a few inquiries, I learned that the apparent state of emergency had something to do with The Incredible Hulk, who had, it seemed, smashed up a cable car. I was pretty upset about this, since our public transportation has enough problems already. I supposed destroying cable cars is one way to let people know what city you're in (cf. The Rock), but you can achieve the same effect with another typical San Francisco scene: footage of sidewalks with SUVs parked on them. Which I would have to admit I'd like to see Hulk SMASH!

Returning from lunch, I walked past The Wall where the bike messengers hang out, and there was Spider-Man, jumping over urban obstacles while somebody filmed him. I was already pretty disoriented by having Marvel comics wander into my reality, so the prospect of a Marvel "guest star" crossover in real life made me woozy.

I noticed that Spidey and his cameraman both had bikes, so I figured they'd be sympathetic to my alternative transportation concerns. "Hey Spider-Man! The Hulk's smashing cable cars up the street!" One of the messengers chimed in, "Go up there and kick his ass!" But Spidey responded, sadly, that the police up there were giving him attitude.

I understood: J. Jonah Jameson, publisher of the San Francisco Chronicle, has pretty much smeared Spidey's reputation, so of course the police wouldn't look too kindly on him. You'd think that J.J.J. would've mellowed out a little after marrying Sharon Stone, but apparently not.

It's just as well. A real-life double super hero comic book crossover would probably have had a bad effect on my reality ...