« Keeping the sex in sexuagenerian | Main | My New Hero »

Shannon Wheeler is an evil, evil man

At Wondercon a week and a half ago, one of the books I picked up was a Too Much Coffee Man collection, Too Much Coffee Man’s Parade of Tirade.

In one non-TMCM-related sequence, two friends are talking in a cafe, and have this exchange:

Hey, listen, they’re playing that Brown-Eyed Girl song you like. You know what that song is really about, don’t you?

It’s about an interracial relationship.

Nope. It’s about butt-sex! …behind the stadium… down in the hollow, playing a new game… hiding behind the rainbow’s wall… slippin’ ‘n’ slidin’…

What’s the old man with a transistor radio mean?

I don’t know.

I refuse to believe that that song is about that.

It doesn’t matter what you believe, because now every time you hear that song you will think of…

That was one of my favorite songs.

It still could be.

It gets much worse. I looked up the lyrics . That old man with the transistor radio? No such beast. The line is “going down the old mine with a transistor radio.”

Did Wheeler know that, and in a pique of evil genius set readers up to make that discovery, further cementing this notion in their heads? I have no idea, but had to share.

You’re welcome.

Comments

Van Morrison originally wanted to call the song "Brown-Skinned Girl" but substituted "Brown-Eyed" because it sounds better when sung. And thus are urban legends born. (Of course I've got my own personal associations with that song, and no, they have nothing to do with anal sex.)

yep. that was intentional. I figured that in a conversation there'd be a little bit of getting the lyrics wrong. I knew people would either know the lyric, or look it up, and that would make a greater emotional reaction and make it more memorable.

But what about Frank Zappa?

Consider that Van Morrison sang "Touch Me There" for the Zappa produced L. Shankar album, (but it was never released due to contractual obligations,)

and that Zappa had a number of anal sex songs (probably ALL of the anal sex songs, outside "Brown Eyed Girl") that were a little more explicit. (You can do your own lyrical research; start with "Broken Hearts are for Assholes", "Jewish Princess", "Token of my Extreme", "He's so gay", "The Illinois Enema Bandit", "Stick it out", "Promiscuous"),

and that Zappa was a coffee addict.

Cosmic coincidence, or inexplicable synchronicity? you decide.

Post a comment

(If you haven't left a comment here before, you may need to be approved by the site owner before your comment will appear. Until then, it won't appear on the entry. Thanks for waiting.)